Why

As I sit here in front of the Television sipping my coffee and listening to the rain, I find myself pondering why I started this blog to begin with.  I have nothing to offer.  I am not an amazing cook, I don't have an amazing story, there is nothing remotely interesting about my life, I am the definition of average... so the question I ask myself is 'why?  Why start a blog that undoubtedly no one will ever read?'  I think the answer I keep coming back to is that it is for me and no one else.  My goal is not to get paid or to gain internet notoriety.   What ever comes of it comes - and I fully suspect that will be nothing!

First thing I want to get out of the way is this ::whispering:: come closer-- a little closer--okay, are you ready for this?--I am NOT perfect.  I know, shocking right?  Alright aside from that, I worked for many many years before being economically placed into the role of stay at home mom over a year ago.  That was a scary, unexpected and, I thought, unwanted transition though I have grown to love my new role in this family.  I admit, once I got past the shock or no longer being employed, it was an amazing change for the better.  It took away a lot of stress and allowed me to be a better wife and a better parent.  There are a lot of people in the world who can make working and parenting coexist in an amazing way.  I guess was not that person, I thought I was but I just never realized how much the stress of my job affected the way I interacted with my family.  I stayed tired and overwhelmed and was therefore unable to enjoy what I had right in front of me.  A beautiful family.

My beautiful family consist of a wonderful husband who works so hard to allow me to stay home and take care of our home and our children.  Two wonderful kids, a boy who is nearly 8 and a girl who is 4.  The boy is in third grade this year.  He has high functioning autism, specifically Asperger's syndrome, which keeps us on our toes.  The has grown in leaps an bound over the last two years especially.  I owe a lot to his amazing school, teachers and therapist.  The girl started an optional state pre-k program this year which is just so sad for me.  I truly miss her company during the day but she is going to a great school where I know she is going to learn and grow so much this year that I don't think it is fair for me to wish I had not sent her.  Though I admit there are days when I feel that way-just a little bit.

So, that's who I am.  Nothing special, nothing amazing but it is what I have to offer.  I can't wait to see where this blog goes because I honestly have no idea what direction it will end up going in.  I am sure there will be many, many random moments as I feel it out.